I was going to write a long screed about the movie I just saw for whose marketing we’re trying to pitch, but I’m too nauseated to be coherent. So, allow me to boil it down into easy-to-digest bullet points:

-If you think watching someone be flayed alive is entertaining, you need to check your ass into a psychiatric facility now. I don’t give a damn if you’re the creator or viewer of said content. Get thee to a nuthouse, ’cause you’re fucking crazy.

-If you expect me to try and sell this trash, you’re even crazier.

-But if you intend on recutting this flick so it’s all about the zombie demolition derby, then we can talk.

8 thoughts on “I Get Paid For This

  1. But the flaying alive is symbolic of the stripping away of self-delusion and coming to grips with the true self. This is art, man!

  2. Then I’d rather not think about the symbolism of that same character getting fed his own flesh before he’s deep fried alive.

  3. That would mean that in today’s society we are forced to consume our own identities to fit in and that fried food is bad for you. See, it’s not so hard.

  4. I scare myself, sometimes.

    A couple of lifetimes ago, I worked as a telemarketer for Time/Life Books. When things got slow on the floor of the phone room, someone would hand me a random volume of one of the series, and I would open to a random page and preach a sermon based on what was on that page. I could always find some sort of analogy and make it work, Whether it was from Home Repair and Improvement or Butterflies of the World.

  5. HSM, of course, could stand a little more flaying.

    I dread the day when our VP comes up to my desk with a HSM retrospective package and asks, “So, how can we reach the kids online to sell more of these?” I think that’s the day I will quit advertising.

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